Valuing Nothing

10

Wednesday, June 19, 2013







"Nothing, like something, happens anywhere." Neil Gaiman, Fragile Things 


Do you value doing nothing? Do you see it as "something" to be valued? Loved these rules for a simpler day. It's summer and I'm embracing a little bit of nothing. How about you? 


images via: a détacher, egmv, tales of endearment. 

The course

3

Monday, June 17, 2013



Everything runs its course. Moods, relationships, habits, passions, being stuck. This weekend we went roller skating, something that I had not done since the last time I had done it all those years ago. In the seventies and eighties, it was kind of my thing. Just thinking that I was around in the seventies, doing things like roller skating at the rink, makes me happy; age is good. 

Feeling the wind rush through my hair every time I passed the circular fan at the far end made me feel alive in a way that I have not felt in a long time. Each lap I felt myself becoming lighter. It's amazing that feeling of body memory. I knew how to skate. It all came back. Friday nights at the roller rink with friends, going into the darkness, the music, a bit of nervousness and the feeling of freedom. It was all there, stored and brought back to the surface for me to live again. 

Now, is a specific period in my life too. I am raising young kids. I will look back on this period as one of the best parts in my life. I will associate certain memories with it, smells, sounds, places, and events. I will want to relive them again one day and I will try. 

Looking over the course of a lifetime there are divisions, chunks of time that can be separated out not only by age or years, but by the more subtle things like relationships, music, a circle of friends, the house you are living in. A course is a continuous progression from one point to the next in onward movement. While it's true that we can never go back and we don't know what lies ahead, I think we can revisit things. Maybe time is like the roller rink, less a straight line, but a never ending circle. Each time around is different, your path is never the same, but you come back around, things repeat themselves subtly. I may begin to imagine time this way, for less would be that rushed feeling of "running out of time." Or maybe I will just revisit the roller rink again and let the memories come back and settle into the present moment of contentment. 

Can I have your attention?

9

Wednesday, June 12, 2013



“Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” Simone Weil

. . . 

Each year at this time there is usually one commencement address that stands out among the others. This year, for me, it was Jonathan Safran Foer's Middlebury College address. You can watch the address here or read portions of it in the NY Times op-ed piece. The part that struck me most was about attention. Listen to this excerpt. 

Everyone wants his parent’s, or friend’s, or partner’s undivided attention — even if many of us, especially children, are getting used to far less. Simone Weil wrote, “Attention is the rarest and purest form of generosity.” By this definition, our relationships to the world, and to one another, and to ourselves, are becoming increasingly miserly.

Most of our communication technologies began as diminished substitutes for an impossible activity. We couldn’t always see one another face to face, so the telephone made it possible to keep in touch at a distance. One is not always home, so the answering machine made a kind of interaction possible without the person being near his phone. Online communication originated as a substitute for telephonic communication, which was considered, for whatever reasons, too burdensome or inconvenient. And then texting, which facilitated yet faster, and more mobile, messaging. These inventions were not created to be improvements upon face-to-face communication, but a declension of acceptable, if diminished, substitutes for it.

But then a funny thing happened: we began to prefer the diminished substitutes. It’s easier to make a phone call than to schlep to see someone in person. Leaving a message on someone’s machine is easier than having a phone conversation — you can say what you need to say without a response; hard news is easier to leave; it’s easier to check in without becoming entangled. So we began calling when we knew no one would pick up.

Shooting off an e-mail is easier, still, because one can hide behind the absence of vocal inflection, and of course there’s no chance of accidentally catching someone. And texting is even easier, as the expectation for articulateness is further reduced, and another shell is offered to hide in. Each step “forward” has made it easier, just a little, to avoid the emotional work of being present, to convey information rather than humanity.

THE problem with accepting — with preferring — diminished substitutes is that over time, we, too, become diminished substitutes. People who become used to saying little become used to feeling little.

. . .

It's really heavy, right? Even if it's not you who are guilty of preferring diminished substitutes and giving real interactions less attention, it's our society, it's the world our children are walking into and the energy we are steeped in everyday. I think about how many times I have said, "just a minute" to my girls as I have replied to a text, typed off a quick email, or composed a caption for a picture. I am pretty conscious about putting the phone away to focus and engage, but I am a work from home mom, with kids at home a lot, and the balance of the two is extremely difficult to find. And in a hurried world where texting or communicating in the comments of a public forum are becoming the norm, it's hard not to play along. 

So how do we move ahead in a world that's connecting us together but is also pulling us apart? 

I think it has to be about balance and about valuing personal interaction. It has to be about taking the extra step to think, say, converse, and feel. We need to give attention and teach attention. We need to hold tight to our emotionality, bearing unscripted interactions that have the power to unhinge us, but also bring about moments of clarity and richness that only face to face communication can do. It's about standing guard over our time, over chance encounters, and unhurried conversations with friends or strangers. It's about paying attention. Really deeply paying attention.

Foer ends with this, "We live in a world made up more of story than stuff. We are creatures of memory more than reminders, of love more than likes. Being attentive to the needs of others might not be the point of life, but it is the work of life. It can be messy, and painful, and almost impossibly difficult. But it is not something we give. It is what we get in exchange for having to die."

I'd love to know what you think. xx

one night

3

Monday, June 3, 2013


sometimes you just need to 
walk out into the night, 
into crowded streets 
to feel alive.

sometimes you just need to get into your car
together,
without a plan 
and start driving.

sometimes you end up in a dark underground bar 
with live music & strong drinks 
that quickly wash away the busyness that's gotten between you.

sometimes, one night is all it takes to reconnect again.

floodline

1

Thursday, May 2, 2013






we all have those points at which we break.
the water has risen too high,
it's flooding.

then the tide recedes,
things dry out,
and the waters are calm once again.

it is in these times of high rise that we need to know our floodline. 

+++

As I stand back and look at my life lately, I notice that I don't live at an even rhythm. I have waves of being super busy, up late, with too many things happening at once, feeling overwhelmed and not sleeping. Then, I either complete the things I am working on or just finally tire out and relax. I tune back into the slower life, light candles, cook a beautiful meal, linger, garden, catch up on reading, and simply hang with my family. Then, at some point, this cycle starts all over again. 

I look at my husband, or rather he looks at me, wondering why I go through all this craziness all the time, while he is so steady, even, rhythmic. Last night we talked about having too many interests, too many things that I am pursuing at one time. 

You can have it all, just not all at once. 

Ah, yes, this. I re-discovered this quote recently. While I haven't stopped trying to do it all right now, I've starting to become aware of the possible impossibility of it. At least that's a start, right?


images: pool, mexico beach, floodline series 2 by lisa golightly.